Finding Freedom and Leaning into Expansion
Finding Freedom and Leaning into Expansion
A new way to approach change.
I’m embarking on a new adventure. Well, it’s not exactly new. It would be more accurate to say I am continuing this adventure with a fresh perspective and a new navigation system. The adventure is me. It feels like a new adventure because I’m releasing old ways of looking at myself and my life.
It’s not the first self-improvement kick I’ve embraced. In fact, my last kick kicked off about this time last year. Maybe it’s the increased daylight hours and warmer temperatures. It could be the sounds of spring all around me, the hum of a lawnmower in the distance and birdsong, nearby in the eves of my house, perhaps.
In the past, when I would get all hyped to “fix my life in 30 days with 5 new habits!” (That’s not a bad headline. I may tuck it away for another time.) I would go all in,…for a week, two weeks max, and then my resolve would fizzle, leaving me with a sense of defeat. Another crash and burn for all-or-nothing girl.
My attempt to do a complete overhaul of myself would leave me feeling overwhelmed and burnt out. And worse, it was confirmation of my belief that I can’t make any good habit stick. I wonder, though, if that’s really true. If I look more closely I can see that my life is ruled by habits. Some of them are good habits, and some of them, let’s just say, are not serving my highest good.
A good habit is one that supports my health; physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual health. I have several already that do that. My journaling practice - good! My habit of telling my family members that I love them every day - good! My habit of listening to informative, inspiring and entertaining podcasts and audiobooks on my way to and from work is a very good for my mental and emotional health. Plus, it has the added benefit of ensuring I never forget my phone when I leave the house because it is my habit to open my phone as soon as I get in the car to choose my listening material for the drive.
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” ~Lao Tzu
I am constantly looking for ways to improve my experience of life on this planet. The difference this time is that I’m leaning into expansion, a concept I have been inspired to adopt after listening to Karen Walrond’s audiobook Radiant Rebellion. (Karen also writes on Substack at The Chookooloonks Make Light Journal) I have added several ideas to my self-improvement expansion agenda. My new navigation system for expanding the desired areas of my life requires me to start with just one thing at a time. Revolutionary, huh? Well, it is for me, recovering all-or-nothing girl.
I made a list of all the changes I believe will help create the me I want to grow into. It was hard to chose just one area to focus on right now. They all seem so important, crucial even. I reminded myself that I have not had success with tackling every needed change at one time. All quickly turns into nothing.
I decided my physical health is the most important place to start. I have a history of dieting, both for weight loss and to find relief from physical ailments. I’ve tried them all. Juicing, low fat, low carb, no carbs, gluten free, dairy free, gluten and dairy free, elimination diets, you name it, I’ve at least considered it.
I want to learn to listen to my body. I want to tune in and give my body what it needs. I don’t want to restrict myself anymore. I want freedom. I’m taking one of the suggestions in Radiant Rebellion, and in the spirit of seeking expansion, I plan to add fresh, locally-grown vegetables to my menu rotation, which is sadly lacking in that area.
The timing couldn’t be better. In three weeks the farmer’s market downtown opens for the season. I have always wanted to visit the market weekly. I’m lucky if I make it at all during the five months it’s open. One of my not-so-great habits interferes with me getting there. I love my lazy Saturday mornings, which if I’m being completely honest, turn into lazy weekends, where I don’t change out of my pajamas for any reason.
I have made a promise to myself that when the market opens, I will set my alarm, get dressed and have some coffee and breakfast before heading out the door. I love the market when I get there. Walking and browsing the vendors’ booths fuels my creativity. Besides local produce, there are generously large bouquets of flowers, artisan crafts and jewelry, paintings, sculptures and carvings, live music, a variety of food trucks and people watching. A feast for every sense! I am energized just thinking of it.
I have tried to break the habit of pajamas only on the weekends without success several times. Shifting my focus from restriction to embracing a new, eagerly anticipated activity instead, may just be my ticket out of those lazy weekend blahs. I’ll still probably spend Sundays in cozy jammies and slippers though. It’s too delicious a thing to deny myself completely.
Some exciting news! After an eight-month break (aka debilitating self-doubt induced writer’s block) I have begun writing my novel again. Enjoy this sneak peek!*
*Note: I wish there were a way on Substack to allow comments from everyone on posts with paid content. Unfortunately, there isn’t. I am reserving sneak peeks for paid subscribers because it’s content that I feel vulnerable sharing, so I’d like to limit the audience for that. I do value every reader and love to hear your thoughts, so if you have a comment for this post, please feel free to add it to any of the completely public posts.
